How do I get iTunes to recognize a new device if I accidentally did not hit new device when I first hooked it up? I hit the button that said I wanted to back it up from my old info

How do I get iTunes to recognize a new device if I accidentally did not hit new device when I first hooked it up? I hit the button that said I wanted to back it up from my old phone. The new phone is my husbands and I don't want to back up my phone info on it. I re connected it hoping it would prompt me with the option again and it doesn't , it just shows up as a back up to my phone. How can I get it to give me that option in the beginning again
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First of all, I think the first time you sync an iPod that's formatted for Windows on a Mac, the sync process reformats it for Mac. You can check what it is now by looking for the iPod with Disk Utility. If it's Mac OS Extended, it's formatted for Mac already.
Also, there is no current iPod updater app these days. iTunes handles it through the Restore button. If you are not able to use the latest iTunes because of your Mac, I can understand. The latest version of iTunes should run with 10.3.9 or later, if the hardware can handle it.
You said the battery was low so let it recharge for a while.
You should also reset the iPod. It's part of the 5Rs, which you should go through as the starting point for iPod trouble-shooting.
http://www.apple.com/support/ipod/five_rs/wheel/